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Overcoming Anxiety and Insecurity in Parenting
The Fruit of the Spirit
Two of the most common things that parents face are anxiety and insecurity. And in Galatians 5, you’ll not find anxiety or insecurity listed as fruits of the Spirit. They are not something that comes from God and walking with God. It’s intrinsic and natural for parents to feel this way. Anxiety comes from a desire to have control over our circumstances and not lose things, and insecurity comes from a self-awareness that admits, I’m not perfect. I’m falling short.
It’s typical for us to feel anxiety because we want something important to go well, and we feel like it’s up to us to do so. And when it doesn’t, we get scared, or we feel like, by the power of our worry, we might be able to control our circumstances.
But what you see in the Gospels is a difference between people who aren’t Christ and Christ himself. People who aren’t Christ will be anxious in a boat that’s in a storm. They’re afraid, they’re fearful, they’re crying out, Are you not concerned about what we’re concerned about?
Good News for Parents
Adam Griffin
This book provides parents with a gospel-centered perspective to navigate the challenges of parenting. With this hope, they can embrace their role with peace and confidence, trusting that Jesus is renewing both them and their children day by day.
And yet they look to Christ, and what is Christ doing? Christ does not fret. He’s not anxious. Paul actually tells us we have nothing to be anxious about—“Be anxious about nothing” (Phil. 4:6). Similarly, insecurity is a natural part of being a person who’s aware of their own propensity to make mistakes. But that is not a fruit of the Spirit. Peace is a fruit of the Spirit. Insecurity is not a fruit of the Spirit. But you know what is? Goodness.
Somehow, even in our imperfection, even in my sin (we all fall short of the glory of God), God would say that somehow goodness is in me. Where does that goodness come from? It’s not intrinsic to me. It comes from the Lord. But when I walk with the Lord, there can be goodness in me. There can be peace in me. And peace is not the absence of difficult circumstances; it’s the presence of contentment in the midst of them. And our sense of goodness is not the absence of sin in our lives. We will always, on this side of heaven, have sin. But we believe that there is good work to be done that the Lord calls us to, and he is pleased with those who have faith.
If we want peace and goodness, it starts with faith.
If we want peace and goodness, it starts with faith. It comes from trusting that God knows, God can, and God is taking care of me. And so when I trust that I am home-free—that my victory is assured, and no one can take it away from me, and no one can separate me from the love of God—then I have faith and trust in a holy God who will not drop me, and no one can wrestle me away from his grip.
So where do I lay my anxiety? Scripture says I can cast all my anxieties onto him because, Peter says, he cares for me. And since God cares for me, everything I have that is anxious and insecure can be cast down at his feet. And that is one of the greatest privileges of the Christian parent. All that anxiety and insecurity I can cast off. It doesn’t have to stick to me. Let it roll off my back. Why? Because he cares for me.
Adam Griffin is the author of Good News for Parents: How God Can Restore Our Joy and Relieve Our Burdens.
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